drinking in the beautiful qingdao
September 13th, 2004 stevel
we went to Qingdao this weekend, and quite literally drank it in. Qingdao is the home of the most famous Chinese beer: Tsingtao, and…well, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. or in our case, when in Qingdao, drink a ridiculous amount of Tsingtao beer.
We headed out on an overnight sleeper train with most of the SKaDS-QE Beijing team, and a few people from the desktop (Evolution, Mozilla, JDS, Glow, etc.) group. We arrived, and after a huge seafood lunch, we jumped into our tour bus for a whirlwind tour of LaoShan (the famous mountain in the region).
China’s mini “tour-bus-for-a-day” tours seem to be a ubiquitous part of any China tourist experience. I usually prefer to travel by myself and take my time, but with a big group, a tour is inevitable. In any case, it was a good experience and a lot of fun. We saw a pretty cool Taoist temple which has apparently been there for like 2000 years or something. We experience a tea ceremony/sales pitch, and then continued up to where we were finally able to hike in peace and quiet. Just me, Poorna, our group, hundreds of Chinese tourists, and tourist booths lining the entire stairway up.
Ugh… I love China and all… and I consider myself a pretty flexible traveller, heck, I can tolerate tourist booths down in the main areas fine - but the beauty of LaoShan is entirely ruined by all these people shouting and pushing their silk art, sea shells, and tea on you every 5 feet.
After a while, we found a waterfall which was clearly marked off-limits. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I wandered off the beaten path, scrambled over some rocks, and went to go check out the fall/pool. Yes, I know this wrong…blah blah blah, sorry - I wouldn’t do this in the states where things are actually closed for good reason (i.e.: to save the environment from excessive human trespass) - but I can’t believe that China’s NPS would tolerate people throwing crap into the pool, and littering all over the trail, yet shut off this one part.
Anyway, Poorna and I wandered over there and waded around for a while until the rest of our SKaDS-QE folks joined us, and then about 20 other Chinese tourists followed suit. 
Oh well….solitarity is short lived in China.
A bunch of us had brought up cans of Tsingtao with us to drink atop LaoShan, so after cooling them in the pool, we cracked ‘em open and had a good long pull of some good Chinese beer.
Poorna and I saw a cool rickety old metal bridge, so we did what any good monkey king (my nickname), and Turf Boy (poorna’s nickname for the day) would do. We hung from it.
Poorna pointed out that there wasn’t a sign saying not to do it. I rebutted with “well, there wasn’t a sign saying not to stab people either - it’s kind of one of those implied things”.
On the way down, Poorna and I posed in some of the chairs that people paid 30 RMB to be carried up in. We then headed back for a drive-by tour of the city with some more drinking involved along the way.
We then went to dinner at a supposedly great seafood restaurant which operated on the sidewalk in town. We ate, we drank, and we were merry. Behind us there were some people selling Tsingtao straight from the keg. Apparently you put it into regular old plastic bags. Of course, Poorna and I tried to drink from the bags with only some minor spillage. After a dinner which some people claimed was inadequate, and horrible horrible service (one waitress kept spilling stuff all over Henry), a dispute ensued. Both our group, and another group complained to the manager about the poor food, and horrible service. Angry words (warning, that one’s a Quicktime movie) were exchanged, and the owner called in the police. More arguments proceeded forth with one policeman trying desperately to mediate the dispute. A lot of Chinese was flying through the air (words, not people), so Poorna and I did what any non-Chinese-speaking people who have a pleasant beer buzz would do in the situation. We started goofing off with the cop car. The policeman were friendly and let us pose outside the car, but said they couldn’t let us sit inside due to regulations. 
Darn. I tried to convince Poorna to get himself arrested so I could take a photo, but he apparently wasn’t that drunk.
We then wandered down to the boardwalk and I got a neat photo of the billboards reflecting off the ocean. After a whole day of eating ridiculous amount of seafood, Poorna the vegetarion said he couldn’t take it anymore, so we headed to McDonald’s with Kevin (our Beijing manager) so we could some milkshakes and french fries.
We then retired to the hotel where we were accosted by hot girls propositioning us for massages. My room was right around the corner from the elevator, so I got off on my floor, and walked into my room. Unbeknownst to me, a “massage-girl” managed to slip in my door as it was closing. I jumped in the air when I heard her say: Her: “Massage-e okay?” Me: “What the fuck. How’d you get in here?” Her: “Massage-e? You want massage-e?” Me: “No, I don’t want massage-e. Bu yao!” Her: “Massage-e okay?” Me: “NO! Massage-e not okay. Massage-e BU OKAY. BU OKAY!” Her (grabbing my arm): “Only massage! Only massage!” (stroking my arm) Me: “NO! QU. GO AWAY. YOU BU OKAY!”
at which point I just started shoving her out the door. Poorna had an interesting experience too, but you’ll have to ask him about that one… 
On our second day, we went to go take a walk by the beach, and then we split up with Huajian, Kevin, Robin, Poorna, and I proceeding up to walk around the BaDaGuan area to see some really cool English and German architecture and homes. We also saw a wedding, where Poorna managed to convince a lion dancer to let him wear the head and give everyone an impromptu Indian/Chinese fusion lion dance.
We then held an impromptu SKaDS-QE Beijing Beer Meeting, before heading over to Xiao Qingdao (Little Qingdao), a small island off the coast where you can wander around aimlessly for fun. Poorna and I practiced our kung fu for our ultimate Chinese Indian epic kung fu battle.
We then headed down so Poorna could get in touch with his inner princess, and then headed to a really cool seafood (again!) boat restaurant. Poorna couldn’t take all the seafood, and finally snapped. That’s probably the closest he’ll get to touching a Chinese chick’s ass. [Badum-ching!]
We then headed to Carre Four, a French/Asian Costco where we saw an enormous mooncake. We picked up some snacks and dinner for the ride back.
We then went back to the hotel, met up with everyone and caught our overnight train ride back to Beijing where Poorna and I are now sluggishly chugging through another work day.
Tonight, we’re off to “bar street”, a district known for its bars and restaurants. We’ll see if Poorna can get any more Chinese ass… Until next time…
[tags: ChinaBlog]
2 Comments Add your own
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1.
chester | September 13th, 2004 at 16:16
HAHAHA! Sounds like you got that Bu Yao part down pretty well. Just make sure they dont have the whole “no means yes” thing in China too
And your Chinglish is getting better!! You Bu Okay is a great one hehe -
2.
Qingdao China Guide | April 10th, 2007 at 23:20
It sounds like you guys had a fantastic time. Are you coming back for the 2008 Sailing Regatta?
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